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The first round of the playoff pitted old foes against each other. For some it was contests with the most important reward of all - cash - at stake, for others it was battling personal demons, and for others still it was a matter of mild disinterest in an already long lost season. Here it is, your first round playoff summary:
Average score came in at 97.1 points, down from last week's 101.3. And this week's average margin of victory came in at 31.9 as all games were decided cleanly.
Performer of The Week:
6 teams made it into triple digits this week, with 2 teams clearing the 120 point hurdle. This week's honours go to Lance and his 146.9 points. Sadly, this performance came in the Consolation Ladder with no one watching or caring. Jeff Alls takes the "High Scorer That Means Something" this week with his 108.2 points.
Senorita Of The Week:
File this one under "Going out with a whimper". Kevin's 54.3 points in a 92.6 point loss to his basketball pal Lance might as well be his receipt for buying the NBA Season's Pass.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
No games decided by single digits this week. Keep calm and carry on.
Winner's Bracket:
The road to the big cash prize pitted "old friends and possible future lovers...again" Jay Hauser vs. Tim Ashby in one side of the bracket and "never been in the same room together" Jeff Alls vs. Devin Mackesy in the other.
Ashby took down Hauser 99.3-75.3. Let's just say that this was not an impressive match going into the Grand Finale as one would want to see a solid triple digit score and not an opponent that rolls over like a well trained Golden Retriever. I'm predicting second place for you, Tim. I also believe that the Fantasy Football Gods will punish your early season hubristic declaration of undefeatability (possibly not a word).
Jeff Alls rode Brees' 55.5 points to a 108.2-85.7 defeat of Devin Mackesy and Aaron Rodgers. It would apear as though Mr. Rodgers took a break at a most unfortunate time for Devo. More shocking, it would appear that Jeff has some sort of fantasy football ESP / psychic powers as he openly challenged your beloved commissioner's plan for the payout structure as if he knew he would be playing for the big money at year's end. Scary.
So the set up is a Tim Ashby vs. Jeff Alls. North Toronto vs. East Antwerp. Poutine vs. Frites with mayo. Rob Ford vs. Patrick Janssens (look it up). Hello Kitty Fancier Magazine Subscriber vs. Beer and Beard Monthly Subscriber.
My prediction Alls 106, Ashby 62.6.
State of the League:
WINNER'S BRACKET
» Championship Matchup
#3 Stiff Brees (DMc)
(8-6)Jeff Alls
0
#1 FAST BOWLERS (ASHB)
(9-4-1)Tim Ashby
0
WINNER'S CONSOLATION LADDER
#4 GENTLEMAN'S INTERMISSION (HAUS)
(7-7)Jay Hauser
0
#2 Team Cryptkeeper (YARR)
(9-4-1)Devin Devin
0
CONSOLATION LADDER
#11 Abe Froman (ANDR)
(5-9)kevin Andrachuk
0
#10 Carmen Jello (CJ)
(6-8)Matthew Fusco
0
#8 Stack's House (STAK)
(7-7)Gregor Davidson
0
#5 T-Dot The 99% (99%)
(7-7)Mith Bobo
0
#9 Team Tap Out (HARR)
(6-8)Jamie Harris
0
#6 Team BadNewsBrawlers (DEAN)
(7-7)Mike DeAngelis
0
#12 Inglorious Bastards (RICH)
(5-9)Lance Richter
0
#7 The Blue Steel Dynasty (BS)
(7-7)Jason Madge
0
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Beloved Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
Koala Towers - Kangaroo Plaza
121 Didgeridoo Lane
Perth, WA
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Week 14 Summary - All Over But The Crying, And The Playoffs
Week 14 brought clarity in a hotly contested run to the playoffs. It also brought further contention in how we are to distribute the cash and secretly, a decision on the future leadership of the league. Let's get through this together, shall we?
Average score increased slightly again to 101.3 points from last week's 100.8, while the average margin narrowed a touch to 18.3 due to a combination of blowouts and close ones.
Performer of The Week:
7 teams made it into triple digits this week, with 3 teams clearing the 120 point hurdle. Taking the honours this week is Jeff Alls, all the way from Antwerp and his 129.6 points. Honourable mentions to Lance (121.2), and Kevin (120.1).
Senorita Of The Week:
Mike D has fallen back to the bottom with 62.6 points - somebody should start tallying this category as I'm pretty sure Mike broke his own record for SOTWs. I remember when Mike wanted to be better. That was a long, long time ago, and I can only imagine the disdain his daughter holds for him.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Three close ones this week, but the closest one was Ashby's squeaker of a victory over Madge by just 1.5 points. Kevin also came from behind to defeat Devo by just 3 points. This combination left us with a tie at the top of the standings. So un satisfying.
9-4-1 Club:
Tim and Devo have finished the regular season ensconced in the leaders lounge. Truly, this is my winter of discontent.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Madge could have used Julio Jones' 25. Seems fitting to end the regular season with the namesake taking his award.
State of the League:
TEAM W L T PCT GB
FAST BOWLERS 9 4 1 .679 --
Team Cryptkeeper 9 4 1 .679 --
Stiff Brees 8 6 0 .571 1.5
GENTLEMAN'S INTERMISSION 7 7 0 .500 2.5
T-Dot The 99% 7 7 0 .500 2.5
Team BadNewsBrawlers 7 7 0 .500 2.5
The Blue Steel Dynasty 7 7 0 .500 2.5
Stack's House 7 7 0 .500 2.5
Team Tap Out 6 8 0 .429 3.5
Carmen Jello 6 8 0 .429 3.5
Abe Froman 5 9 0 .357 4.5
Inglorious Bastards 5 9 0 .357 4.5
So, there it is. The computer will figure out the match ups and we'll go from there. But, it would appear as though Ashby, Devo, Alls, and Hauser are playing for the cash. Good luck with that. I'm praying for it to go to Antwerp.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Beloved Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
Koala Towers - Kangaroo Plaza
121 Didgeridoo Lane
Perth, WA
Average score increased slightly again to 101.3 points from last week's 100.8, while the average margin narrowed a touch to 18.3 due to a combination of blowouts and close ones.
Performer of The Week:
7 teams made it into triple digits this week, with 3 teams clearing the 120 point hurdle. Taking the honours this week is Jeff Alls, all the way from Antwerp and his 129.6 points. Honourable mentions to Lance (121.2), and Kevin (120.1).
Senorita Of The Week:
Mike D has fallen back to the bottom with 62.6 points - somebody should start tallying this category as I'm pretty sure Mike broke his own record for SOTWs. I remember when Mike wanted to be better. That was a long, long time ago, and I can only imagine the disdain his daughter holds for him.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Three close ones this week, but the closest one was Ashby's squeaker of a victory over Madge by just 1.5 points. Kevin also came from behind to defeat Devo by just 3 points. This combination left us with a tie at the top of the standings. So un satisfying.
9-4-1 Club:
Tim and Devo have finished the regular season ensconced in the leaders lounge. Truly, this is my winter of discontent.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Madge could have used Julio Jones' 25. Seems fitting to end the regular season with the namesake taking his award.
State of the League:
TEAM W L T PCT GB
FAST BOWLERS 9 4 1 .679 --
Team Cryptkeeper 9 4 1 .679 --
Stiff Brees 8 6 0 .571 1.5
GENTLEMAN'S INTERMISSION 7 7 0 .500 2.5
T-Dot The 99% 7 7 0 .500 2.5
Team BadNewsBrawlers 7 7 0 .500 2.5
The Blue Steel Dynasty 7 7 0 .500 2.5
Stack's House 7 7 0 .500 2.5
Team Tap Out 6 8 0 .429 3.5
Carmen Jello 6 8 0 .429 3.5
Abe Froman 5 9 0 .357 4.5
Inglorious Bastards 5 9 0 .357 4.5
So, there it is. The computer will figure out the match ups and we'll go from there. But, it would appear as though Ashby, Devo, Alls, and Hauser are playing for the cash. Good luck with that. I'm praying for it to go to Antwerp.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Beloved Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
Koala Towers - Kangaroo Plaza
121 Didgeridoo Lane
Perth, WA
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
Week 13 Summary - League Office Relocates / Some Big Numbers / 1 Week Left
Week 13 brought nails in coffins for some, abject acceptance for others, quiet confidence for some others, and increased anxiety for others still. This week also brings the long-threatened relocation of the league office from Nairobi, Kenya to Perth Australia. I have a bad flu and crazy jet lag, so this summary may have a falloff from its normally high standards. Let's get through this together, shall we?
Average score increased slightly to 100.8 points from last week's 100.4, while the average margin jumped to 20.2 points as only one game was close this week. 4 Teams put up over 120 points while just one couldn't cear the 70 point hurdle.
Performer of The Week:
With 5 teams in triple digits this week , we were once again spoiled for choice in this category. THis week's face full of glory goes to....ugh...Madge and his 151.2 points. Ugh. He'll be impossible at the Christmas dinner this weekend. Thanks to Allah that I'm many, many thousands of kms away. Honourable mentions to Jeff Alls (135.6), Ashby (127.2), Devo (121.8), and Eric/Pat/Sunny (103).
Senorita Of The Week:
Mike D's streak of despair has ended. James A. Harris, and your 69.9 points take the dirty, dirty cake of SOTW. Brady can't help you anymore...
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Just one close match this week, Mike D over Kevin A by 2.7. The only good thing that has happened to Kevin this season has been the resolution of the NBA labour dispute. Trust me, had they not resolved it, he would have been on high doses of malbec and white owl cigars. This is not necessarily a bad thing...
9-3-1 Club:
Devo remains ensconced in the warm glow of sole-possession of the lead...but will it remain this way??? Can Ashby tie it up in the last week of the regular season?
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
.
State of the League:
TEAM W L T PCT GB
Team Cryptkeeper 9 3 1 .731 --
FAST BOWLERS 8 4 1 .654 1
Stiff Brees 7 6 0 .538 2.5
Team BadNewsBrawlers 7 6 0 .538 2.5
The Blue Steel Dynasty 7 6 0 .538 2.5
Stack's House 7 6 0 .538 2.5
GENTLEMAN'S INTERMISSION 6 7 0 .462 3.5
T-Dot The 99% 6 7 0 .462 3.5
Team Tap Out 6 7 0 .462 3.5
Inglorious Bastards 5 8 0 .385 4.5
Carmen Jello 5 8 0 .385 4.5
Abe Froman 4 9 0 .308 5.5
In and safe - Devo and Ashby. Discuss amongst yourselves.
2.5 Back - 4 for 2 spots - Alls, Mike D (c'mon, really?), Madge (Ugh), and Gregor.
3.5 Back - Hauser, Eric/Pat/Sunny, and Harris - The truth is, I'm too drugged up to do the math. Please submit your own dream scenario of how you could make the playoffs.
The Walking Dead - Kevin, Fusco, Lance - I'm stuck with the basketball fans. At least they have something to look forward too. I, on the other hand, will spend the off-season getting a gun and hunting the most dangerous game of all.
Also, don't forget to vote on how to split up the big $$$ in the poll on the league page.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Beloved Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
Koala Towers - Kangaroo Plaza
121 Didgeridoo Lane
Perth, WA
Average score increased slightly to 100.8 points from last week's 100.4, while the average margin jumped to 20.2 points as only one game was close this week. 4 Teams put up over 120 points while just one couldn't cear the 70 point hurdle.
Performer of The Week:
With 5 teams in triple digits this week , we were once again spoiled for choice in this category. THis week's face full of glory goes to....ugh...Madge and his 151.2 points. Ugh. He'll be impossible at the Christmas dinner this weekend. Thanks to Allah that I'm many, many thousands of kms away. Honourable mentions to Jeff Alls (135.6), Ashby (127.2), Devo (121.8), and Eric/Pat/Sunny (103).
Senorita Of The Week:
Mike D's streak of despair has ended. James A. Harris, and your 69.9 points take the dirty, dirty cake of SOTW. Brady can't help you anymore...
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Just one close match this week, Mike D over Kevin A by 2.7. The only good thing that has happened to Kevin this season has been the resolution of the NBA labour dispute. Trust me, had they not resolved it, he would have been on high doses of malbec and white owl cigars. This is not necessarily a bad thing...
9-3-1 Club:
Devo remains ensconced in the warm glow of sole-possession of the lead...but will it remain this way??? Can Ashby tie it up in the last week of the regular season?
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
.
State of the League:
TEAM W L T PCT GB
Team Cryptkeeper 9 3 1 .731 --
FAST BOWLERS 8 4 1 .654 1
Stiff Brees 7 6 0 .538 2.5
Team BadNewsBrawlers 7 6 0 .538 2.5
The Blue Steel Dynasty 7 6 0 .538 2.5
Stack's House 7 6 0 .538 2.5
GENTLEMAN'S INTERMISSION 6 7 0 .462 3.5
T-Dot The 99% 6 7 0 .462 3.5
Team Tap Out 6 7 0 .462 3.5
Inglorious Bastards 5 8 0 .385 4.5
Carmen Jello 5 8 0 .385 4.5
Abe Froman 4 9 0 .308 5.5
In and safe - Devo and Ashby. Discuss amongst yourselves.
2.5 Back - 4 for 2 spots - Alls, Mike D (c'mon, really?), Madge (Ugh), and Gregor.
3.5 Back - Hauser, Eric/Pat/Sunny, and Harris - The truth is, I'm too drugged up to do the math. Please submit your own dream scenario of how you could make the playoffs.
The Walking Dead - Kevin, Fusco, Lance - I'm stuck with the basketball fans. At least they have something to look forward too. I, on the other hand, will spend the off-season getting a gun and hunting the most dangerous game of all.
Also, don't forget to vote on how to split up the big $$$ in the poll on the league page.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Beloved Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
Koala Towers - Kangaroo Plaza
121 Didgeridoo Lane
Perth, WA
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