As always, you can read it online at:
http://cebfl.blogspot.com/
But for those that are too lazy to even click:
Week 12 brought much change to our Fantasy Football island including a mass exodus from the leaders lounge. Only three teams managed to make it into triple digits and just one close match this week. The average score came in at 94.1 pts, down from last week's 109.9. The average margin of victory narrowed to 20.9 pts.
Performer of The Week:
Kevin Andrachuk, 120.5 pts. Where did that come from? Way to cast off the matching heels and purse. But why against me, Kevin? Why?
Honourable mention to Eric/Pat/Sunny and their 114.1 pts. But really shouldn't that only count as 38.03 points each???
Senorita Of The Week:
Jamie Harris, 61.3 points. Way to get kicked out of the Leaders' Lounge in a classy way, James. Limping out just like you limped in. Please ask Kevin for the heels and purse.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Just one close one this week as Hauser went biblical on Ashby and took the victory by a mere 4.6 points. I'm not sure if the rest of you saw this, but I heard the winner of this match is allowed to teabag the loser. I guess for this pair, nobody loses. Except for Tim.
The 8-4 Club:
Unfortunately, this week was a bit like a Chinese Fire Drill in the Leaders' Lounge as many members were shown the exit. Some unceremoniously, such as Harris and Ashby who had no right to be there. And others, such as Matthew J. Fusco, were flown out respectfully in the club's Gulfstream. This tradition for only the most deserving of members is in the same vein as when a president leaves office and is allowed to take Air Force 1 home one last time.
Remaining in the lounge are Madge and Eric/Pat/Sunny. But just outside, lives a pack of ravenous dogs waiting to strike. Don't rest too comfortably...
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Lance could have used Cassel's 39.2. I'm just saying.
State of The League:
It ain't over, folks. The 4 playoff spots are up in the air. Oh wait. Actually, it is over for some of the league. I'm afraid Lance has joined the deadpool currently filled with the floating corpses of Mike D., Hauser, and Devo. In case you guys didn't know, there is just 2 games to go before the playoffs and you are at least 3 games behind.
As for the rest of us, 8 teams are playing for 4 playoff spots. Can Kevin and Jeff run the table and give themselves a shot? Or will they just hang around enough to bother some of the real contenders. We all know Harris is destined to plummet down the standings and probably won't see another win this year and settle at 7-7.
Ashby is cursed and doomed to miss the playoffs, and Gregor has squeaked his way into contention.
2 more weeks. Can Fusco keep it together???
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Week 11 Summary - Points Everywhere Again / Harris Still Fading / Close Ones / Not So Lonely At The Top
As always, you can read it online at:
http://cebfl.blogspot.com/
But for those that are too lazy to even click:
There were lots of points to go around this week as the bye weeks have ended and owners seem to have a good feel for who will put up the points. Scoring jumped yet again this week as 8 teams made it into triple digits and all but 2 cleared the 90 pt hurdle. The average rose again to 102.9 pts from last week's 99.7 pts. The average margin of victory stayed healthy, but slipped a bit to 26.8 pts from last week's 28.4 pts as we had 3 close ones and 3 matches decided by more than 40 pts. Which is a lot.
Performer of The Week:
Devin Mackesy, 136.2 pts. Where did that come from? Rodgers' 43.2 certainly helped.
Honourable mentions to Ashby (125.9) and Madge (120.9).
Senorita Of The Week:
Kevin Andrachuk, 69.9 points. Not horrible, but low enough to score you the purse and matching heels. And a 56 point shellacking at the hands of Ashby. This just in from Kevin's PR department:
Please note that Mr. Andrachuk's first and only real love is Basketball. He is devoting all his energies to managing his fantasy team in that sport. Due to his fantasy football team's players' inability to execute to the level that Mr. Andrachuk demands, he has little time to even answer emails from those related to fantasy football.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Three close ones this week as Eric/Pat/Sunny clipped my bunch of bed-crappers by 9.7, and Hauser took Mike D. a little too lightly and was beaten by 1.3 pts (P.S. Parade for Mike D's victory in Little Italy on Thursday - Sangwiches and Brio for everybody!) and best of the best, Alls clipped Harris by exactly 1 point despite Harris' pleas to the ESPN score keepers for an overnight adjustment. Such behaviour is most unbecoming of a leaders lounge member. His status was never permanent, but you can rest assured that his membership is under review.
The 7-4 Club:
This once sacred space has taken on the charm of an all-you-can-eat Las Vegas buffet. Membership has swelled to an uncomfortable count of 5. Eric/Pat/Sunny - you'll only be allowed in one at a time. Ashby, we've arranged for a Hello Kitty Litter box for you in the corner, and Madge will be required to cuddle/rear-naked choke with Harris due to space considerations. I have locked myself in the spacious and luxuriously appointed liquor locker and hope to wait out these barbarians that have somehow found their way far beyond my gate.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Harris could have used Lee Evans' 7 points, as you may recall, he lost by just 1 point.
Hauser could have used Holmes' 25 or even Woodhead's 14, as he also lost by just a little bit (1.3 points in this case).
State of The League:
Just 4 spots for 5 teams at 7-4: Eric/Pat/Sunny, Ashby, Madge, Harris and Fusco. I hear they're thinking of making an "It gets better" video. High stakes musical chairs.
On the outside, looking in at 6-5: Jeff and Gregor. Puncher's chance.
Talking fantasy basketball trades at 5-6: Lance and Kevin. See you next year.
Fodder for the weekly summary at 3-8: Mike D., Hauser, and Devo.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
http://cebfl.blogspot.com/
But for those that are too lazy to even click:
There were lots of points to go around this week as the bye weeks have ended and owners seem to have a good feel for who will put up the points. Scoring jumped yet again this week as 8 teams made it into triple digits and all but 2 cleared the 90 pt hurdle. The average rose again to 102.9 pts from last week's 99.7 pts. The average margin of victory stayed healthy, but slipped a bit to 26.8 pts from last week's 28.4 pts as we had 3 close ones and 3 matches decided by more than 40 pts. Which is a lot.
Performer of The Week:
Devin Mackesy, 136.2 pts. Where did that come from? Rodgers' 43.2 certainly helped.
Honourable mentions to Ashby (125.9) and Madge (120.9).
Senorita Of The Week:
Kevin Andrachuk, 69.9 points. Not horrible, but low enough to score you the purse and matching heels. And a 56 point shellacking at the hands of Ashby. This just in from Kevin's PR department:
Please note that Mr. Andrachuk's first and only real love is Basketball. He is devoting all his energies to managing his fantasy team in that sport. Due to his fantasy football team's players' inability to execute to the level that Mr. Andrachuk demands, he has little time to even answer emails from those related to fantasy football.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Three close ones this week as Eric/Pat/Sunny clipped my bunch of bed-crappers by 9.7, and Hauser took Mike D. a little too lightly and was beaten by 1.3 pts (P.S. Parade for Mike D's victory in Little Italy on Thursday - Sangwiches and Brio for everybody!) and best of the best, Alls clipped Harris by exactly 1 point despite Harris' pleas to the ESPN score keepers for an overnight adjustment. Such behaviour is most unbecoming of a leaders lounge member. His status was never permanent, but you can rest assured that his membership is under review.
The 7-4 Club:
This once sacred space has taken on the charm of an all-you-can-eat Las Vegas buffet. Membership has swelled to an uncomfortable count of 5. Eric/Pat/Sunny - you'll only be allowed in one at a time. Ashby, we've arranged for a Hello Kitty Litter box for you in the corner, and Madge will be required to cuddle/rear-naked choke with Harris due to space considerations. I have locked myself in the spacious and luxuriously appointed liquor locker and hope to wait out these barbarians that have somehow found their way far beyond my gate.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Harris could have used Lee Evans' 7 points, as you may recall, he lost by just 1 point.
Hauser could have used Holmes' 25 or even Woodhead's 14, as he also lost by just a little bit (1.3 points in this case).
State of The League:
Just 4 spots for 5 teams at 7-4: Eric/Pat/Sunny, Ashby, Madge, Harris and Fusco. I hear they're thinking of making an "It gets better" video. High stakes musical chairs.
On the outside, looking in at 6-5: Jeff and Gregor. Puncher's chance.
Talking fantasy basketball trades at 5-6: Lance and Kevin. See you next year.
Fodder for the weekly summary at 3-8: Mike D., Hauser, and Devo.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Week 10 Summary - Points Everywhere / Harris Fading / Conflicted Dog Lovers / Gregor On A Run / Double Secret Defensive Penalty
As always, you can read it online at:
http://cebfl.blogspot.com/
But for those that are too lazy to even click:
Scoring jumped a bunch this week as 7 teams made it into triple digits and 5 teams cleared the 120 pt mark. The average rose considerably to 99.7 pts from last week's 85.1 pts. The average margin of victory grew to 28.4 pts from last week's 23.9 pts.
Performer of The Week:
Gregor Davidson, 145 points. Many thanks to Michael Vick and his massive 63 points - just look at his line:
STARTERS: OFFENSIVE PLAYERS WK 10 PASSING RUSHING RECEIVING MISC TOTAL
SLOT PLAYER, TEAM POS OPP STATUS ET C/A YDS TD INT RUSH YDS TD REC YDS TD 2PC FUML RTD PTS
QB Michael Vick, Phi QB
@Was
W 59-28 20/28 333 4 0 8 80 2 0 0 0 0 0 0 63
I think that even dog lovers might be ok with him on their teams now. What's a little pitting animal against animal for gambling purposes anyways?
Honourable mentions to Pat/Eric/Sunny (138.2), Hauser (131.1 in a losing effort), Mike D. (128, also in a loss and payback for starting bye week players last week) and Fusco (124.7).
Senorita Of The Week:
Jason Madge, 46.9 points. This could have been 56.9 points, but you got slapped with the sneaky -10 for starting a defence that allowed more than 45 points. My favourite scoring rule in our league. It is a rare occurrence, but always fun to see. Also, it would appear as though you attended Mike D's roster management seminar as you started a kicker on a bye week. I think I'll start taking 10 pts from anybody that starts a player on a bye. I sense things are falling apart at the Blue Steel HQ.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
No close one this week as nothing was decided by less than 10 points.
The 7-3 Club:
Harris continued his fading ways this week by posting a mere 55.7 points in his loss to Kevin. As I've been saying for weeks, he simply doesn't deserve his key to the leaders' lounge. Fortunately, I'm back in the lounge and after reviewing the security footage of the last week, am saddened to tell you about the many, many rear naked chokes caught on film. And I emphasize the word "naked". This much man-wrestling can't be good and my presence will put a stop to it. I'll have to re-hire the female waitstaff and maybe Jamie's HR expertise will allow us to escape litigation as we terminate his man-servants. After reviewing the deliveries of the last week, I'm shocked to see this much Vaseline in one place. Fortunately for all, I don't see Harris staying much longer as his rapidly declining scoring line would allow him to lose most match-ups, except for maybe one against Madge.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Eric/Pat/Sunny, Tom Brady on the bench with 44. Fortunately a strong showing by your kicker and defence on MNF saved you from a belittling here. But still, Mr. Brady on the bench??? I suggest keeping him there for some time.
Lance left Cassel and his 52.3 pts on the bench, but didn't need them against Madge.
What can I say? There wasn't much to chastise people for this week.
State of The League:
Harris - It is over, James. Your time in the spotlight has come to an end. Now, please let the grown-ups play their game.
Fusco - Doing much better emotionally this week, although still disgusted by Harris' presence in the leaders' lounge.
Gregor, Eric/Pat/Sunny, Ashby, and Madge - all tied at 6-4. Gregor on a 3 game winning streak and riding the high that is 63 pts from your QB. EPS is the steady hand at the wheel, still a little under the radar, but hanging around. Ashby and Madge - what you both did this week is nothing to be proud of. Is this the beginning of your fade into oblivion?
Lance, Jeff, and Kevin. 5-5.
Hauser, 3-7. The lesson learned here is, never, ever think you've got it won. Haus must be near suicidal after that loss.
Mike D. and Devo at 2-8. But one of them is actually happy to have made it to 2 wins.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
http://cebfl.blogspot.com/
But for those that are too lazy to even click:
Scoring jumped a bunch this week as 7 teams made it into triple digits and 5 teams cleared the 120 pt mark. The average rose considerably to 99.7 pts from last week's 85.1 pts. The average margin of victory grew to 28.4 pts from last week's 23.9 pts.
Performer of The Week:
Gregor Davidson, 145 points. Many thanks to Michael Vick and his massive 63 points - just look at his line:
STARTERS: OFFENSIVE PLAYERS WK 10 PASSING RUSHING RECEIVING MISC TOTAL
SLOT PLAYER, TEAM POS OPP STATUS ET C/A YDS TD INT RUSH YDS TD REC YDS TD 2PC FUML RTD PTS
QB Michael Vick, Phi QB
@Was
W 59-28 20/28 333 4 0 8 80 2 0 0 0 0 0 0 63
I think that even dog lovers might be ok with him on their teams now. What's a little pitting animal against animal for gambling purposes anyways?
Honourable mentions to Pat/Eric/Sunny (138.2), Hauser (131.1 in a losing effort), Mike D. (128, also in a loss and payback for starting bye week players last week) and Fusco (124.7).
Senorita Of The Week:
Jason Madge, 46.9 points. This could have been 56.9 points, but you got slapped with the sneaky -10 for starting a defence that allowed more than 45 points. My favourite scoring rule in our league. It is a rare occurrence, but always fun to see. Also, it would appear as though you attended Mike D's roster management seminar as you started a kicker on a bye week. I think I'll start taking 10 pts from anybody that starts a player on a bye. I sense things are falling apart at the Blue Steel HQ.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
No close one this week as nothing was decided by less than 10 points.
The 7-3 Club:
Harris continued his fading ways this week by posting a mere 55.7 points in his loss to Kevin. As I've been saying for weeks, he simply doesn't deserve his key to the leaders' lounge. Fortunately, I'm back in the lounge and after reviewing the security footage of the last week, am saddened to tell you about the many, many rear naked chokes caught on film. And I emphasize the word "naked". This much man-wrestling can't be good and my presence will put a stop to it. I'll have to re-hire the female waitstaff and maybe Jamie's HR expertise will allow us to escape litigation as we terminate his man-servants. After reviewing the deliveries of the last week, I'm shocked to see this much Vaseline in one place. Fortunately for all, I don't see Harris staying much longer as his rapidly declining scoring line would allow him to lose most match-ups, except for maybe one against Madge.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Eric/Pat/Sunny, Tom Brady on the bench with 44. Fortunately a strong showing by your kicker and defence on MNF saved you from a belittling here. But still, Mr. Brady on the bench??? I suggest keeping him there for some time.
Lance left Cassel and his 52.3 pts on the bench, but didn't need them against Madge.
What can I say? There wasn't much to chastise people for this week.
State of The League:
Harris - It is over, James. Your time in the spotlight has come to an end. Now, please let the grown-ups play their game.
Fusco - Doing much better emotionally this week, although still disgusted by Harris' presence in the leaders' lounge.
Gregor, Eric/Pat/Sunny, Ashby, and Madge - all tied at 6-4. Gregor on a 3 game winning streak and riding the high that is 63 pts from your QB. EPS is the steady hand at the wheel, still a little under the radar, but hanging around. Ashby and Madge - what you both did this week is nothing to be proud of. Is this the beginning of your fade into oblivion?
Lance, Jeff, and Kevin. 5-5.
Hauser, 3-7. The lesson learned here is, never, ever think you've got it won. Haus must be near suicidal after that loss.
Mike D. and Devo at 2-8. But one of them is actually happy to have made it to 2 wins.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Week 9 Summary - Africa Has Problems / New Lone Leader / Devo Dominates Defeats / Mike D. Reaches a New Low
As always, you can read it online at:
http://cebfl.blogspot.com/
But for those that are too lazy to even click:
A brief editorial note prior to this week's summary: Africa has problems. War, famine, poverty, HIV/Aids. You name it, and it is here. But, as you all know, despite the fact I so rarely put myself into this column, I'd like to tell you about the African plight I experienced first hand this weekend. My internet access was down. It was down all weekend and I was unable to start Brett Favre. While I had no idea he would play that well, I knew he'd do at least OK as he was playing Mike D's beloved Arizona Cardinals. Personally, I feel as though my years of effort and hard work have built up enough credibility to simply change the outcome of my match against Gregor, as we all know I should have won. But I don't think that would lend credence to the fine tradition and expectations of this league. So I'll take my lumps and secretly resent you all as the rest of the season plays out. But for now, onto the summary:
Scoring stayed low this week, but the average rose slightly to 85.1 pts from last week's 84.4 pts, as once again, only 2 teams managed to score in the triple digits. The average margin of victory narrowed to 23.9 pts from last week's 25.6 pts.
Performer of The Week:
Madger the Angry Badger takes it again this week with 121 points. Sadly, he was mostly quiet this week as it seemed as though his hatred for Ashby went on a little holiday. I expect the angry rhetoric to heat up again as they are now tied in the standings at 6-3 along with the rotting corpse and technical difficulties that is yours truly.
Honourable mention to Jeff and his 117.1 pts, the only other team to makeit over 100 pts.
Senorita Of The Week:
This wasn't even close as Mike D. crapped not only his matrimonial bed, but perhaps the bed of his daughter as well. 46.7 pts with bye week players in 2 starting positions. You have a blackberry, use it to set your line-up. This isn't rocket surgery. At least pretend to give a shit like you do in front of clients during "the largest purchase of their lives"...
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Two close ones this week as Gregor violated my recently deceased body of a team by 8.5 points and Birthday boy Jamie Harris was the beneficiary of an overnight scoring adjustment that gave him a victory by 1.2 pts over Eric/Pat/Sunny and sole possession of first place.
The 7-2 Club:
I woke this morning to see that Harris was just losing to Eric/Pat/Sunny. It was a pleasant way to start my day. Sadly, this feeling was short-lived as when I checked back in after the overnight processing, my fears had come true. A slight point adjustment gave Harris the slight victory and the only key to the leader's lounge. What can I say? Despite his 7 game winning streak, he has no right to be in the lounge. You betcha I'm pissed. His last 2 weeks have been terrible and not leader-worthy. But the worst part of it all is that he will be putting Tap Out and UFC posters everywhere and charging the leader's lounge with so-much homo-erotic energy that there will be no way to keep Ashby and Madge out of there. Get ready for all-shirtless man-wrestling all of the time.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Please see above explanation re: Lack of internet access, Farve and his 38.6 pts. A very sad week.
State of The League:
Harris - He has limped into the leader's lounge on a 7 game winning streak after starting 0-2. This ends. Soon.
Fusco - Not doing well emotionally. Sharing 2nd place with Ashby and Madge is not a happy place for him. Ashby and Madge must be thrilled to be mentioned in the same paragraph as Fusco.
Gregor, Jeff, and Eric/Pat/Sunny - all tied at 5-3. Nobody really has the eye of the tiger here. I blame Pat as all his energy is going towards growing a moustache for Movember.
Lance and Kevin. 4-5. I guess you guys must really be focusing on your other fantasy teams now that the NBA season has started.
Hauser is showing signs of life at 3-6. If, by life you mean he has lost twice as many games as he has won.
Mike D. at 2-7. A sad effort this week, Mike. I've been disappointed yet again, even despite my incredibly low expectations for you.
Devo, 1-8. No words.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
http://cebfl.blogspot.com/
But for those that are too lazy to even click:
A brief editorial note prior to this week's summary: Africa has problems. War, famine, poverty, HIV/Aids. You name it, and it is here. But, as you all know, despite the fact I so rarely put myself into this column, I'd like to tell you about the African plight I experienced first hand this weekend. My internet access was down. It was down all weekend and I was unable to start Brett Favre. While I had no idea he would play that well, I knew he'd do at least OK as he was playing Mike D's beloved Arizona Cardinals. Personally, I feel as though my years of effort and hard work have built up enough credibility to simply change the outcome of my match against Gregor, as we all know I should have won. But I don't think that would lend credence to the fine tradition and expectations of this league. So I'll take my lumps and secretly resent you all as the rest of the season plays out. But for now, onto the summary:
Scoring stayed low this week, but the average rose slightly to 85.1 pts from last week's 84.4 pts, as once again, only 2 teams managed to score in the triple digits. The average margin of victory narrowed to 23.9 pts from last week's 25.6 pts.
Performer of The Week:
Madger the Angry Badger takes it again this week with 121 points. Sadly, he was mostly quiet this week as it seemed as though his hatred for Ashby went on a little holiday. I expect the angry rhetoric to heat up again as they are now tied in the standings at 6-3 along with the rotting corpse and technical difficulties that is yours truly.
Honourable mention to Jeff and his 117.1 pts, the only other team to makeit over 100 pts.
Senorita Of The Week:
This wasn't even close as Mike D. crapped not only his matrimonial bed, but perhaps the bed of his daughter as well. 46.7 pts with bye week players in 2 starting positions. You have a blackberry, use it to set your line-up. This isn't rocket surgery. At least pretend to give a shit like you do in front of clients during "the largest purchase of their lives"...
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Two close ones this week as Gregor violated my recently deceased body of a team by 8.5 points and Birthday boy Jamie Harris was the beneficiary of an overnight scoring adjustment that gave him a victory by 1.2 pts over Eric/Pat/Sunny and sole possession of first place.
The 7-2 Club:
I woke this morning to see that Harris was just losing to Eric/Pat/Sunny. It was a pleasant way to start my day. Sadly, this feeling was short-lived as when I checked back in after the overnight processing, my fears had come true. A slight point adjustment gave Harris the slight victory and the only key to the leader's lounge. What can I say? Despite his 7 game winning streak, he has no right to be in the lounge. You betcha I'm pissed. His last 2 weeks have been terrible and not leader-worthy. But the worst part of it all is that he will be putting Tap Out and UFC posters everywhere and charging the leader's lounge with so-much homo-erotic energy that there will be no way to keep Ashby and Madge out of there. Get ready for all-shirtless man-wrestling all of the time.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Please see above explanation re: Lack of internet access, Farve and his 38.6 pts. A very sad week.
State of The League:
Harris - He has limped into the leader's lounge on a 7 game winning streak after starting 0-2. This ends. Soon.
Fusco - Not doing well emotionally. Sharing 2nd place with Ashby and Madge is not a happy place for him. Ashby and Madge must be thrilled to be mentioned in the same paragraph as Fusco.
Gregor, Jeff, and Eric/Pat/Sunny - all tied at 5-3. Nobody really has the eye of the tiger here. I blame Pat as all his energy is going towards growing a moustache for Movember.
Lance and Kevin. 4-5. I guess you guys must really be focusing on your other fantasy teams now that the NBA season has started.
Hauser is showing signs of life at 3-6. If, by life you mean he has lost twice as many games as he has won.
Mike D. at 2-7. A sad effort this week, Mike. I've been disappointed yet again, even despite my incredibly low expectations for you.
Devo, 1-8. No words.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Week 8 Summary - The End of An Era / Harris?!?!?! / Devo Defeated and Back In The Basement All Alone
As always, you can read it online at:
http://cebfl.blogspot.com/
But for those that are too lazy to even click:
A brief editorial note prior to this week's summary: As regular readers will know, my retirement has allowed me to provide such regular and excellent content to you due to a dedication of man hours and a desire to not not just share my innermost thoughts and emotions, but to entertain as well. Well, in what can only be considered rather sad news, my retirement has ended. I have taken a job running a furniture factory in the industrial area of Nairobi. The end of retirement is just one week old, but I trust you'll understand that the long hours spent at the office will result in a later than usual delivery time of this fine publication. But for now, onto the summary:
Scoring dropped sharply this week as only 2 teams managed to score in the triple digits. Combine that with 2 scores in the 50's and you the average drops all the way to 84.4 pts from last week's 101.3 pts. This was an ugly week with lots of players on bye weeks and of course the fantasy death of both my original QBs. The average margin of victory, however grew slightly again to 25.6 pts from 21.7 pts as 3 matches were decided by 30+ pts and just one close one this week.
Performer of The Week:
Madger the Angry Badger, 118.6 points. His fight with Tim will continue and we shall all be amused.
Honourable mention to Gregor (106.8), the only other team to make it over 100 pts.
Senorita Of The Week:
This was actually the closest contest this week as Devo's score of 57.5 was able to squeak just below a name seen often in this space - Mike D. and his 58.7 pts. Well done Devo, you suck.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Just the one close one this week as Jeff clipped Kevin by 2.2 pts. I predict Kevin's only solace will be in European clothing sized for Asians. Think about it.
The 6-2 Club:
I was so over-joyed at defeating Ashby last week that I must admit that I wasn't quite looking in the rear-view mirror. And much to my surprise, Harris has snuck into the leader's lounge. I'll play nicely as he's new to this kind of thing. I'll maybe even give him a few tips like which fork to use and how easy it is to beat Ashby.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Kevin Andrachuk could have used Michael Bush AGAIN this week. Or even Ryan Matthews.
State of The League:
Fusco - Still good and leading. But his leadership, much like his grip on reality is slipping away.
Harris - Surprisingly frisky and good. Although, less good than Fusco.
Ashby, Madge, and Eric/Pat/Sunny - tied for 3rd place at 5-3. Ashby on the slippery slope. EPS - thankful for this week to be over as I've never seen that many guys on a bye week. And then there's Madge. No comment on Madge.
Gregor, Lance, Jeff, and Kevin. .500 hundred. Heads or tails?
Hauser and Mike D. at 2-6. I'm surprised you guys haven't swallowed a revolver yet. This, friends, is bad. Intervention time.
Devo, 1-7. Wow. That's nearly Kevin Andrachuk bad.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
http://cebfl.blogspot.com/
But for those that are too lazy to even click:
A brief editorial note prior to this week's summary: As regular readers will know, my retirement has allowed me to provide such regular and excellent content to you due to a dedication of man hours and a desire to not not just share my innermost thoughts and emotions, but to entertain as well. Well, in what can only be considered rather sad news, my retirement has ended. I have taken a job running a furniture factory in the industrial area of Nairobi. The end of retirement is just one week old, but I trust you'll understand that the long hours spent at the office will result in a later than usual delivery time of this fine publication. But for now, onto the summary:
Scoring dropped sharply this week as only 2 teams managed to score in the triple digits. Combine that with 2 scores in the 50's and you the average drops all the way to 84.4 pts from last week's 101.3 pts. This was an ugly week with lots of players on bye weeks and of course the fantasy death of both my original QBs. The average margin of victory, however grew slightly again to 25.6 pts from 21.7 pts as 3 matches were decided by 30+ pts and just one close one this week.
Performer of The Week:
Madger the Angry Badger, 118.6 points. His fight with Tim will continue and we shall all be amused.
Honourable mention to Gregor (106.8), the only other team to make it over 100 pts.
Senorita Of The Week:
This was actually the closest contest this week as Devo's score of 57.5 was able to squeak just below a name seen often in this space - Mike D. and his 58.7 pts. Well done Devo, you suck.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Just the one close one this week as Jeff clipped Kevin by 2.2 pts. I predict Kevin's only solace will be in European clothing sized for Asians. Think about it.
The 6-2 Club:
I was so over-joyed at defeating Ashby last week that I must admit that I wasn't quite looking in the rear-view mirror. And much to my surprise, Harris has snuck into the leader's lounge. I'll play nicely as he's new to this kind of thing. I'll maybe even give him a few tips like which fork to use and how easy it is to beat Ashby.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Kevin Andrachuk could have used Michael Bush AGAIN this week. Or even Ryan Matthews.
State of The League:
Fusco - Still good and leading. But his leadership, much like his grip on reality is slipping away.
Harris - Surprisingly frisky and good. Although, less good than Fusco.
Ashby, Madge, and Eric/Pat/Sunny - tied for 3rd place at 5-3. Ashby on the slippery slope. EPS - thankful for this week to be over as I've never seen that many guys on a bye week. And then there's Madge. No comment on Madge.
Gregor, Lance, Jeff, and Kevin. .500 hundred. Heads or tails?
Hauser and Mike D. at 2-6. I'm surprised you guys haven't swallowed a revolver yet. This, friends, is bad. Intervention time.
Devo, 1-7. Wow. That's nearly Kevin Andrachuk bad.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)