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Week 4 Summary:
Your beloved commissioner went back, waaaay back to 1994 this last week. Watching football without Fantasycast is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy - even Madge.
The sacrifices I've made in the last week are many. I had to go to a sketchy internet cafe in Korea town to even set my line-up. The good news - I now understand why there are fewer teen-aged hooligans at our malls and on our streets - they are all in poorly-lit internet cafes playing online video games at $2.50/hr.
Average score for Week 4 jumped back up to 93.6 pts, as nobody posted a score in the 50s or 60s.
Average margin of victory fell to 17.3 pts from last week's 23.8 pts, as the games were generally closer with one major exception. That exception happened to also be the largest margin of victory at a healthy 48.5 points (as Jeff continued his white on white crime spree and did very bad things to Tim Ashby and most of his extended family). The closest match came down to 7.5 points (Lance's 2nd win over a waiver-wire-solstice-seeking Mike D.), but it can hardly be called a squeaker. In the "Close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades" category, Madge came in far short of the 30 pt project win over my shitty team.
Performer of The Week:
Jeff Alls threw up 120.9 points is his Ashby-crushing week with solid contributions throughout his line-up and with 3 guys on bye weeks and Kerry Collins as his QB. Jeff has always lived on the edge. I blame his simple country upbringing.
No honourable mentions this week. Not enough points to talk about anybody else.
Senorita Of The Week:
Sadly, I don't have a picture of Tim in a dress. I'm sure there's a number of such pictures out there, I just don't have one. Maybe Hauser has a collection. But, this is almost as good. Curling changes a man. And so does being SOTW. 72.4 points. Not terrible, but the worst of the bunch this week.
Average margin of victory fell to 17.3 pts from last week's 23.8 pts, as the games were generally closer with one major exception. That exception happened to also be the largest margin of victory at a healthy 48.5 points (as Jeff continued his white on white crime spree and did very bad things to Tim Ashby and most of his extended family). The closest match came down to 7.5 points (Lance's 2nd win over a waiver-wire-solstice-seeking Mike D.), but it can hardly be called a squeaker. In the "Close only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades" category, Madge came in far short of the 30 pt project win over my shitty team.
Performer of The Week:
Jeff Alls threw up 120.9 points is his Ashby-crushing week with solid contributions throughout his line-up and with 3 guys on bye weeks and Kerry Collins as his QB. Jeff has always lived on the edge. I blame his simple country upbringing.
No honourable mentions this week. Not enough points to talk about anybody else.
Senorita Of The Week:
Sadly, I don't have a picture of Tim in a dress. I'm sure there's a number of such pictures out there, I just don't have one. Maybe Hauser has a collection. But, this is almost as good. Curling changes a man. And so does being SOTW. 72.4 points. Not terrible, but the worst of the bunch this week.
4-0 Club:
Ugh. Does anyone else find this story line boring? I'm almost as sick of hearing about Devo as I am about the Favre story. Is it possible that Madge's prophecy will come true this week?
Let's poke holes in Devo's streak:
Week 1: A mild 20 pt thrashing of Mike D. A win technically, but hardly a victory.
Week 2: A 118.1 to 74.3 beatdown of me, your beloved Commissioner. Credit where credit is due. Quite the victory.
Week 3: A 118.3 to 79.6 molestation of 'He who is without a win". Shouldn't beating Kevin only count as 1/2 a win???
Week 4: A 87.6 to 77 pt tap on the shoulder to a weakened 3-Headed Monster. No Gore and little contribution from Brees. Quite a points fall off.
That's right folks, he clearly should be 2-2 or 1-3. I'll give him the win over Kev, but the rest of his victories are questionable at best.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
No award this week as no bench player would have helped enough to change any team's fortune. Bye weeks force the results some, or perhaps everybody's ESP is simply clicking right now.
State of the League:
Nice balance in the distribution of the standings. One team at 4-0, three at 3-1, four at 2-2, three at 1-3, and one at 0-4. It would make a pretty graph for all you who remember standard deviation.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commisssioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
Commissioner's Plaza
400 Commissioner's Blvd.
Fantasy Land
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