Read it online here:
http://cebfl.blogspot.com/
or for those that are too lazy to even click:
Week 3 is done and my thesis of "The Excellence That Is All Things Fusco" continues to be supported by the data coming in. I'm sure you will all continue to be fascinated to see the journey and to read my paper on the subject once it is published. And now, onto the summary:
Three teams managed to score over 110 pts this week as Fusco, Gregor, and a surprising Eric/Pat/Sunny all surpassed the magical mark.
Average score rose to 92.3 pts compared to last week's 89.7 pts. The average margin of victory narrowed to 24.9 pts from last week's 29.1 pts as the blow outs weren't as large and scores weren't nearly as awful as some posted in the first 2 weeks.
Performer of The Week:
Gregor Davidson, 119.7 points. In yet another case of new(ish)-guy-on-new(ish)-guy crime, he also posted the biggest margin of victory (46.4 pts) against Jeff Alls. Jeff, by the way, has yet to apologize for missing watching TV on giant football screens due to his parents not leaving.
Honourable mention to your beloved commissioner, and his 113.4 points. Both still remain short of the season's high water mark of 127.1 also set by the same, beloved commissioner.
Senorita Of The Week:
Mike D, 68.6 pts. That's 2 weeks in a row, Mike. Plus, you suffered a 44.8 point beating at my hands. Might I suggest maybe a little less time with the cheese tray and open house crowd and a little more time at the bar with your friends and the giant TVs.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Just two matches decided by less than 10 points: Kevin played the part of man with a broken down van waiting in the alley (wait - this description will pay off shortly) as he nipped Devo by 6.9 pts. And Lance fell victim to the train wreck that is Eric/Pat/Sunny by a margin of 7.2 despite the fact that they started Reggie Bush and his broken leg even though they were warned by email and in person of his condition and not to start him. Fools.
3-0 Club:
Ah...yes, the herd continues to be culled and the club's exclusivity rises as Lance fell victim to the surprising ineptitude that is Eric/Pat/Sunny and the guest list now has but two names on it - Fusco and Ashby. And we all know what shaky ground / thin ice Ashby stands upon.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
Once again, Madge could have used Benson's 19 and Charles' 14.
Devo needed Bowe's 13, Lance could have used Spiller's 15 pts, and Hauser wishes he started Keller and his 21.
Had Fusco started Collie and his 30.6, Mike D. might have simply started his car in his "spacious two-car garage with the convenient automatic door" closed.
State of the League:
Week 3 has brought a new-and-improved 4-tier classification system:
1) Enveloped In Excellence: Fusco. And to a lesser extent, Ashby. I mean, look at the PF/PA ratio, the comparison almost isn't fair.
2) Mired In Mediocrity: .667 is better than .500. Just. Lance, Gregor, and Kevin at least have winning records for all you silver-lining types.
3) Drowning In Disappointment: This plunge pool, is six deep: Hauser, Harris, Eric/Pat/Sunny, Madge, Alls, and Mike D. Shame on you all.
4) Alone In The Well In The Commissioner's Basement: Devo, I think we all know what's next - She puts the lotion in the basket.
Still in Toronto, and football at Real Sports Bar again this Sunday for those that can make it. The enjoyment of watching your fellow competitors stress about their fantasy teams in person knows no equal. I recommend it highly. Just don't bother with the pulled pork sandwich.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
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