Week 6 brought with it a small glimmer of hope for your beloved Commissioner, just two scores in the triple digits but three in the 60s, a mild thinning of the leaders lounge, and yet more shame for the team with three owners. I'll be able try to get through the summary without crying and maybe even partially sober:
Average score dropped to a season-low 88 points from last week's 91.7 points and the average margin of victory came in at 16.5 points.
Performer of The Week:
Kevin claimed his team was "firing on all cylinders" and his team backed up his words with 127.7 points. Your beloved Commissioner gets the honourable mention as his team was the only other one in triple digits.
Senorita Of The Week:
Gregor takes the SOTW by stinking up the joint with was able to go just 62.8. I guess that pre-game ritual of watching the volleyball scene in Top Gun on a multi-hour loop didn't work so well.
The "Close-But-No-Cigar" Match (es) of The Week:
Mike D. was able to just clip a slumping Gregor D. by just 1.4 points. Both notched scores in the 60's. Not a great performance by either, but shouldn't the BIG NEWS BE THAT MIKE D. IS AT .500?!?!?!?!!?
5-1 Club:
And then there were 2: the lounge has a lovely and cozy table for two by the fireplace which will seat Devo and Timbo on their second date. No chaperone this week as Gregor lost his membership card and was escorted out of the warm confines but security.
The Jason Madge Memorial "Why Didn't I Start THAT Guy" Fantasy Player of The Week:
The only possible change this week would have been Gregor starting Mike Thomas and his 3 points over Plaxico's 1 point production. Lots of mention of Gregor this week - he usually keeps a low profile...hmmm....
State of the League:
I'm looking for some trash talk - something personal and friendship destroying. Any takers? Especially since most of the league is clumped together at .500:
Standings
1. Team Cryptkeeper 5-1 W3
2. FAST BOWLERS 5-1 W1
3. Stack's House 4-2 L1
4. GENTLEMAN'S INTERMISSION 3-3 L1
5. Stiff Brees 3-3 L1
6. Inglorious Bastards 3-3 L1
7. Team Tap Out 3-3 L1
8. Abe Froman 3-3 W1
9. Team BadNewsBrawlers 3-3 W1
10. The Blue Steel Dynasty 2-4 W1
11. Where To Next? 2-4 W1
12. T-Dot Triple Threat 0-6 L6
Updated Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Dear God,
Please help Eric/Pat/Sunny see the light, abandon their collectively blasphemous ways, and take a path toward the good side and the way to a win. Or not, I'd be pleased to see somebody go winless on the season and I think they have what it takes to do it.
-Matthew John Fusco - Just like Matthew, Mark, Luke, & John - seriously, were my folks God-fearing or what in the early 70's???
Good luck on the waiver wire auction and let's all hope for a little more commissioner love in Week 7.
Commissionarily Yours,
Your Commissioner
Commissioner's Office, Suite 2200
New Commissioner's Plaza
100 Mbeki Tutu Mugabe Blvd.
Nairobi, Kenya
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